What's the Point? Life After Evangelical Patriarchy, Trad Wives, and the Cult is Sometimes Funny
This post is fun. You might like it.
All of the images in this post are from my camera roll.
One of the best things after high-control religion is that not everything has to be serious. And I’m not talking about awkward religious homeschoolers singing Silly Songs with Larry as grownups—I’m talking about random, funny, ridiculous, pointless, relaxing ways to fill my time that absolutely have no capitalistic or theological justification for being.
Maybe the ta-ta parties aren’t the best example. They have a point.
But points are okay. So is serious. What I bristle against is a polarized requirement that we can’t sometimes laugh this business out. Laughing stimulates the vagus nerve, which is a whole subject worth googling and learning about that I won’t go into here. It’s good therapy and gives me an outlet for my giant, robust laughter. This is in direct rebellion to what I was taught as a Trad Wife in Fascinating Womanhood.
But even in recovery, the topics are often so heavy that finding levity and comic relief is essential. If we couldn’t also laugh our trauma out, we’d only have crying as our release option. Well, that and running, orgasms, and somatic movement…
There are no rules here. Sometimes when you’re tired the answer is rest. Sometimes it’s to move. You get to decide. You don’t have to explain your choice to anyone else because you’re free out here.
I made this for dinner. I forgot the avocado. I haven’t eaten it yet so there’s still time to add it. I’m glad.
If you need some emotional support and dinner-time accountability, get a pet. Here’s me with my doctor-in-residence best girl:
and with the boy who hugs my neck:
Writing about if Trad Women are Wearing Underwear or not was activating. We also talked about it and other rape myths on the Wise Jezebels. That podcast is fun and I can say what I want because it’s free out here. There’s no evangelical patriarch trying to be the boss of me and unlike my first blog, I can’t get excommunicated for it. That story is in my book. But when I’m activated I need to move around and laugh and sometimes that means making fun of TradMan with a Pants Party, also on Instagram stories, because he’s a troll who has a lot of opinions about women.
The pants party, like the titty party, always earns amazing contributions from the community. I save both in highlights if you ever just need a giggle.
Oh, one more thing. I have this little Noid guy who tiptoes as a gif on Instagram. I use him when I drop something snarky into stories because he makes me laugh my head off every time. I get lots of questions about him because you have to know the commercials to know who he is.
Maybe this post had a point after all.
Book Office Hours with me here.
More on trad wives and fundamentalism:
What its Really Like to be a Trad Wife
I Would Have Been a Trad Wife Influencer